Things to Keep in Mind...

When you are considering your New Year's resolutions, it might be helpful to think about your mentee. This can be a fun activity: create your New Years resolutions together. Pick a few that you can each support each other in and get going! 

Along those lines, I read this article this morning, and though it was geared towards parents, I think that many of the points made are applicable to you as mentors. It's taken and adapted from Family Circle magazine. They look like common sense, but they can be difficult at times. Just do your best, that is all we can ask for.

• I will always care for my mentee for who they are — not who I want them to be.
• I will give my mentee space to grow, to dream, to succeed and even to fail. Without that space, no growth can occur.
• When discipline is necessary, I will let my mentee know that I disapprove of what they have done, not who they are. It’s a very important distinction.
• I will set limits and help my mentee find security in the knowledge of what is expected of them. They will not have to guess what is right or wrong.
• I will not burden my mentee with emotions and problems they are not equipped to deal with.
• I will encourage my mentee to experience the world and all of its possibilities, taking pains to leave them careful but not fearful.
• I will try to be the kind of person I want my mentee to be: loving, fair-minded, giving and hopeful.

Many happy, warm wishes to you and your families this winter. Let the rain be a reminder of renewal and refreshment as we journey into the new year.

Thank you for being wonderful mentors. With love from all of us here in the Mentor Program.

Topic for October 11th to October 15th

Symbols of Peace

October 24th to November 11th are World Origami Days. Origami is a traditional Japanese folk art, and means "paper folding". This could be a fun activity to do with your mentee. Using recycled paper, construct one of the more popular origami, the crane, which has come to be a symbol of peace in Japan. See the template below.

What symbolizes peace for you? What about for your mentee? Do they think that peace is something that exists in their world? Or do they feel that they live in a world full of chaos? Another art project idea: each of you draw a picture of the internationally recognized peace symbol. Around it, write out the things that make you feel at peace. Use color and pictures to symbolize what peace means to you.

For a history lesson on peace symbols, click here. Some interesting things!!


"Peace cannot be achieved through violence, it can only be attained through understanding."  ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Topic for September 20th to September 24th

College: It's Within Reach

It's never too early to talk about higher education and presenting it as an attainable opportunity for your mentee. There are opportunities to earn savings bonds as early as Kindergarten!! Click on the links below for more information on ideas and opportunities:

Due by Wednesday, September 29th - CADA poster contest (Click the image below to enlarge)

2nd Amendment rights essay contest
Creative drawing contest - due by  Thursday, September 30th
Scholarships for children under 13
Information on scholarships that are less competitive
Scholarships for the Hispanic and Latino community
Unusual scholarships, like scholarships for left-handed students
In general, it would be a good idea to sign up with your mentee to be notified of awards
BUT be aware of SCAMS!!!
FinAID - this is my favorite site for information!
College Board's FUND FINDER
Scholarships.com

Once your mentee is in Middle School, it'd be a good idea to utilize this website: Know How 2 Go
They can sign up for a newsletter to learn about tips and steps to take to go to college.
You can learn, as a mentor, how to help prepare them for college, and there are specific areas designed to help middle school, freshmen, sophomores, juniors, and senior students take the right steps.
"Education is the ability to meet life's situations." ~ Dr. John G. Hibben 

Topic for August 30th to September 3rd

Technology and Mentoring
Do you ever feel like you just can't connect with your mentee? Well, technology can be a great way to do so, especially when you can't see them every week, let alone every day. It can give your mentee the opportunity to connect with you when you're not there in person. And, let's face it. Our youth are more communicative on their public web profiles about what's going on in their lives than they are when you sit across from them and point blank ask them.

Now, I'm not saying that you should search through every bit of their profile to find out what's going on, but they may feel less threatened when you ask them a serious question online or through text. You can also leave on the note, "We can talk more about this when I see you on Thursday, okay?"

There are a lot of different things nowadays that teens and even pre-teens are using. If you aren't familiar with some of the ones listed below, feel free to ask your mentee for a walk through. You would be amazed and how much they know about each of the sites and the details that they understand. This could be a great opportunity for you to acknowledge what they know and even ask them if this is something they have ever considered as a career. There are jobs that pay you to be on social media sites and monitor them! They can even tell you what they don't like about the site(s) they use, and you can write a letter together to those who manage the sites and provide your feedback.

So here are just a few of the technology things of which I'm aware:

Digg <--social news

Users can post links to top news stories or "digg" (vote) them to the top.

Mentor tip: Log on with them and check out the top stories. Sometimes they are truly bizarre and can start a great conversation.
iTunes <--music and other media download
Mentor tip: Look at the top downloads; they'll often be the most popular songs that are listened to by youth
Facebook <--social networking
Mentor tip: There is a "chat" option which allows you to instantly message anyone who is online. It's an online version of sending texts. This gives your mentee the opportunity to talk with you about anything at any time.
Flickr & Picasa <-- photo sharing

Mentor tip: Upload your pictures you take on your outings together and give your mentee the link so they can download your shared memories.

MySpace <--social networking
Mentor tip: This is used more by junior high & high school students than Facebook, and sometimes even elementary students, even though you must be 13 or older to have a page.

Texting via phone

Most of you are familiar with this one at least, and if your mentee has their own cell phone, it's likely that they have sent texts to friends during your times together. 

Mentor tip: text them a reminder about meeting up later for a Blenders.

Tumblr <-- blog or mini blog

Like Twitter in that you can post quick thoughts, but also give you the chance to blog full stories and post pictures.
Twitter <--"mini blogging"
Mentor Tip: "Follow" your mentee to see their quick, one line thoughts. These are often impulsive so they give you a good view into what's going on.
YouTube <-- video sharing
Mentor tip: Ask your mentee to show you their favorite videos. They may not be entertaining for you, but it can give you an idea about what it is that they find entertaining.
Click Here for a more complete list of social media sites. There's everything from gaming sites to blogging to music sharing.

Now some of you may think that promoting use of techonology to communicate is a backwards step in your mentorship and promoting healthy communication skills, but the way I look at it is that if you open yourself up to communicating on their level, they will be more likely to communicate on a more professional level in the future. You can talk about the benefits and downfalls of each type of communication. Clearly, texting lingo is different from the language used in most professional settings, but it gets their message across to their friends in a way that they can relate, thus building their peer social skills. Don't worry; they'll get older and hopefully mature with their texts. And with phones like the iPhone, words often self-correct with Auto Correct. For example, "ive" would change to "I've". So have fun with it for a little while and see how it goes.

Happy myfacetubetumtwittering!!

Topic for August 23rd to August 27th

Back-to-School Talk

Well, today marks the first day of the 2010-2011 school year for most of the Santa Barbara, Goleta, and Carpinteria schools!! Are you excited??

There is so much that they are going to be experiencing this year, new and old. Anxieties, fears, new friends, maybe even new schools. Even if they say they're not excited to go back to class, every kid has some part of them that is happy to be back. They have a schedule, structure, somewhere to be every day. All of their friends are back in one place, and they probably have new clothes to show off. At the very least, most of our kids are glad to be in a safe place for the majority of their day.

All that said, don't be surprised if they tell you that everything's "fine" when you ask about the first days of school. It's almost expected. So think of a different question. Maybe something like, "What was the first thing that made you smile?" or "Who had the coolest haircut?" or "Who were you most excited to see after the summer break?" If you try and narrow on one thing in particular, they have to think about it a little harder. It also shows that you really do care about their first days of school...and, achem, them!!

The beginning of school also means that Computers For Families will be distributing computers through the local schools. If you think your mentee would benefit from having a computer in their home, check out the CALENDAR to see when they'll be at or near their school. Call Kristine Mainland-White at (805) 964-4711x5400 for more details or speak with your case manager. Computers are typically for elementary grades, but if you have a middle school mentee who you feel needs a computer in their home, feel free to call Kristine to talk with her about the options.

Don't forget that Teresa and Juliana are here for you as your case manager. If you need help re-connecting with your mentee after the summer, please ask us! We are happy to attend your "first" school session with you, especially if you started meeting with your mentee this past summer and are unsure about how to transition.

Happy Schooling!

Topic for August 9th to August 13th

PERSEIDS METEOR SHOWER
Thursday, August 12, 2010

It's that time of year again to look up to the skies in the late night hours to view the spectacular showing of the Perseids. This Thursday, from 10 pm to dawn, you can watch the meteors go by during the peak of the shower. Best viewing times will be the hours right before dawn, as NASA states, "dozens of Perseids will be seen per hour."

Try and get to the high spots around Santa Barbara, away from street lights, as the less light that interferes, the better the show!!

If you want to know more about stargazing and constellations, you can also contact El Capitán State Beach about Astronomer-led stargazing with telescopes that occur once a month beginning in May each year. They can be reached at (805) 968-1033. You can also go up to Westmont College every 3rd Friday of the month for a free public tour of the observatory & Keck telescope. Click here for a great sky map for August, or here for the website, which updates the maps every month. Just scroll down about halfway and click on the link for the PDF download in whichever language you'd prefer.

Topic for July 12th to 16th

A TIME FOR FIRSTS

Yesterday's Final resulted in the first World Cup Title won by Spain, and would have been the first for the Netherlands. Although I personally was rooting for the Dutchies, the Spaniards, in my opinion, deserved the win, as they played a better game overall. I can also be proud for the Spaniards because 4th place was the furthest they had ever progressed...and that was in 1950. This was a BIG first for them, and a proud moment for their country.

What is the first memory your mentee has? What about you? When was the first time you were proud of them? When was the first time they were proud of themselves? Talk about other firsts. Maybe the first time they got into a fight with their best friend. Or about the time they first tried Sushi. Or the first time they rode a bike. You can even talk about the first time they felt pressured to try beer or smoke. What did they do? What did you do when that happened to you as a teen?

There is a lesson in everything.

Topic for July 5th to July 9th

FREEDOM

Inspired by our national celebration of Independence, talk about what FREEDOM means with your mentee. And yes, you can discuss the historical importance of freedom to our country, but I also encourage you to talk about what it means to them, in their life. Do they feel like they have freedom in their home? How about in their school? What would freedom look like to them if they felt that they didn't have it? Do they think they have limited freedom for a good reason? Do they think that you give them freedom of speech, at the very least? What other types of freedom could you work on together? What kind of freedom is your mentee willing to give you?

Let freedom ring.

Topic for June 28th to July 2nd

Looking at the world
Literally. Take a look at our world. It's massive. There are billions of people populating our planet. What do you/your mentee think makes it special? Why are differences good? Would it be easier if everyone was the same? Why can differences be detrimental?

What does your mentee appreciate about what the world has to offer to them? Where would they live if they could live anywhere? (Don't be surprised if they answer the country where their parents are from, as that may be the only country of which they know anything about.)

"The world is a playground, and life is pushing my swing." ~Natalie Kocsis

Explore.

Topic for June 21st

Fathers


"A father is neither an anchor to hold us back, nor a sail to take us there, but a guiding light whose love shows us the way." ~Anonymous


You as a mentor are probably pretty aware of your student's family situation. They may or may not have a father actively involved in their lives. As yesterday was Father's Day, this would be a good thing to discuss with them this week. Find out how it was for them; it may be an eye-opening experience. Their father could be incarcerated. They may never have met their father. Maybe their father is there physically, but not emotionally or personally for them. Or maybe their father is the biggest hero in their life and they don't know how to show them. It may even be that you know and can see the love their father has for them but doesn't have the opportunity to prove it to them. Help your mentee learn to talk about this and their other familial relationships. Allow them a safe place and reassure them that whatever it is they share with you is kept confidential (exception of mandated reporting issues). Bring it out of them by shooting hoops together, or throwing a football, or putting a book together as a gift, and ask if this is something they would do with their father. There are many casual scenarios during which you can start this important conversation. Ask your case manager if you would like additional suggestions.


"Fathers have grown in many ways, children in only a few. And yet it is often hard to tell, just who is teaching who."


Grow together.

Topic for June 14th to June 28th

Embarrassing Moments

I promise I won't center all the topics around the World Cup, but if you happened to watch the England vs. USA game on Saturday, you watched as England's keeper allowed a ball to cross over the goal line. 

This probably topped the list in Rob Green's life of embarrassing moments. 

What has been your most embarrassing moment? How did you recover from it? How about your mentee? Help remind them that we are only human. We falter sometimes, but what matters is how we handle the "after" portion. Don't be afraid to laugh at yourself :-p

Fortunately for England, the game ended in a tie. Fortunately for Rob Green as well.

Laugh often. It's contagious and good for the soul.

Topic of the week: World Cup 2010!

Okay, so this one may be a bit biased, but I can't help it! The 2010 World Cup kicks off at the end of this week in South Africa!!! So as much as I would like to be there for it, alas, I will be watching on a television when I can...

However, for the many of you that have mentees interested in soccer, it could be a good time to educate yourself a little bit about this event. So check out this website and make your picks: FIFA World Cup 2010

Here are some random facts that may be good too:

**It is the most popular sport in the WORLD (in both spectators & active participants), but is known as "Football" in most countries. Well, in English it's Football, but in Spanish, "fútbol", Dutch "voetbal", German"Fußball", Italian "calcio", Thai "ฟุตบอล", and well, you get the picture...

**The largest attendance for a soccer match ever was 199,854 people - Brazil v. Uruguay in the World Cup at the Maracana Municipal Stadium, Rio de Janeiro, July 1950.

**The international governing body of soccer is the Federation Internationale de Football Association (FIFA), based in Zurich, Switzerland.

So those are just a few basics...now you can research some more yourselves! Look into the matches, have a friendly competition with your mentee, see who comes out on top! The excitement has just begun ;)

Play On!

Topic of the Week: SUMMER!!!

Every kid is looking forward to the time of year when they don't have to be sitting in a classroom. Make sure you take advantage of this time with your mentee and RELAX!! There are so many things that Santa Barbara has to offer to you this summer, so be sure to keep your eyes open! 
Find out what your mentee has planned and see if you can be involved in any of it. Many programs like Fun in the Sun will allow you to meet with your mentee at the school sites, if you still wish to see them and are not comfortable taking them anywhere. You can also check with the local Boys & Girls Club (www.boysgirls.org & www.unitedbg.org) (or have us check with them). Our mentees can have FREE memberships to those facilities, giving you both access to basketball courts, ping pong tables, music lessons, and the like.

For a list of summer camps, check out: http://www.independent.com/news/2010/apr/08/summer-adventure-guide-2010/

For the Santa Barbara Public Library's Summer Reading Program (also good for the Carp and Goleta libraries), see: http://www.sbplibrary.org/kids/index.html
The kids can read for rewards...a good thing to do with them if you want to keep it a little educational!!

jump in and make a splash!

Topic of the Week: Memorial Day

The topic for this week stems from Memorial Day, which will be observed in the US next Monday, May 31st. It commemorates those men and women who have died while serving our country.

Does your mentee know what Memorial Day stands for? Or do they just think of it as a day off from school? Do they understand that it is to remember people who have been lost in war and that those people are brothers, sisters, mothers, father, aunts and uncles? Have they ever lost someone in their life that they cared about? What do they do to remember them? Would they like to do something on Memorial Day to commemorate what they meant to them?

love and peace.

Topic for May 17th to May 21st

Next week marks the start of the 2010 "Click it or Ticket" Campaign. The cost of an adult seat belt violation in California costs $142, and up to $445 for not properly restraining a child under 16.  If the parent is not in the car, the driver gets the ticket. This effort is all to ensure the safety of those in the vehicle. For more info, check do a Google search and type in "click it or ticket california 2010". The first result is a Word document with a bunch of Q & As.

Ask your mentee what he or she does to stay safe. Are they buckled up when they're in a car? Do they feel safe walking or biking or riding the bus to/from school? Do they feel safe playing in their neighborhood? What could they do to be safer? Do they use their bike helmet? Do they use crosswalks? Are they out late at night without a flashlight? Do they walk around with their electronic devices out in the open, so they can easily be taken from them?
Open the discussion. See what grows. Happy learning!

Topic for May 10th to May 14th

Next Week (May 17th to May 21st) is National Bike to Work week, with National Bike to Work Day on May 21st! Santa Barbara will be celebrating with Bike to School and Work Day on the 18th. This is all in an effort to reduce our carbon footprint. Why not ask your mentee what he/she does to make this world cleaner/ more liveable? What’s one thing more that they could do? Why is it important?

To find out more about Santa Barbara activities surround National Bike Week, please visit: CycleMAYnia

In celebration of Bike FROM Work Day on May 18th, you should stop by State Street between De La Guerra and Ortega to watch a free BMX show @ 5:30 & 7:30, enjoy live music, FREE Chino's Tacos, and a raffle for a new commuter bike!! Check out the flyer for more information!!

Marvelous May

Lesson Idea: The United States makes so much more out of Cinco de Mayo than the people of Mexico. The holiday is mostly celebrated by the Mexican state of Puebla. Why not look into the significance of this holiday with your mentee, and find out why the United States turned it into a day they wanted to celebrate? Ask your mentee what, if anything, their family does for Cinco de Mayo. This could turn into a conversation about family traditions...

Bowl to Benefit Santa Barbara's Teen Court!
3rd Annual Law Bowl
Saturday, May 22nd
12 to 2 PM
Zodo's Bowling and Beyond
5925 Calle Real, Goleta, CA 93117


Community members and organizations have donated money in support of Santa Barbara's Teen Court. This means that they have sponsored lanes to allow our youth to bowl who are involved with CADA youth programs, including the Mentor Program. So far we have one lane available to us, which means that 5 mentees can bowl for free!! Mentors, you won't have the chance to bowl yourself this time, but don't worry, we will have a bowling event in the summer in which you can participate!


Spots are available on a first come, first serve basis. RSVP to your case manager! We will take a waiting list in case other spots open! 


To find out more about Teen Court, visit their website: http://cadasb.org/youth-services/teen-court.aspx
To find out how to support Law Bowl, go here: http://cadasb.givezooks.com/events/third-annual-lawbowl

Mentor Training: Knowing the Signs of Domestic Violence
Wednesday, May 26th
5:30 to 6:30 pm
CADA • 2nd Floor • Conference Room 2
232 E. Canon Perdido St., Santa Barbara, CA 93101

Join us for a training led by Christy Haynes, Teen Services Coordinator for Domestic Violence Solutions for Santa Barbara County. Christy has worked and advocated for teens in school and agency settings for the past 20 years, creating and implementing programs focusing on violence prevention, conflict resolution, anger management and personal development. She has worked with teens in junior high and high schools, Juvenile Hall, Probation, Community Counseling and Education Center, as national facilitator for The Joseph Matteucci Foundation, and as executive director of re:solutions. Christy received her Master’s Degree in Psychology in 1999 at Antioch University, Santa Barbara, with a special focus in Community Psychology.

Christy will help us learn to identify the signs that could be a potentially dangerous living situation for our mentees and/or their family. She'll also help us know how to talk with a youth who maybe has a history of violence in the home, and how to talk with them about these scary situations.


To learn more about DVS, you can look at their website: http://www.dvsolutions.org/default.aspx


RSVP no later than Monday, May 24th at 5 PM to either Juliana or Teresa.